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He wondered why I wasn't into anal if I claim to be sex positive. Nikki Goldstein, sexologist and author of , tells Marie that sexual empowerment is not about doing everything sexually."Rather it's about having the freedom to explore your own sexuality however you choose.

"No" does not mean "no to vaginal sex, but maybe anal is fine." "No" means "no." No explanation needed.

Even if anal is less shrouded in shame than it once was, it's still not something young people are learning about or talking about openly.

But there are pressing questions to be discussed: If anal sex is normalized and becomes a part of our everyday sexual understanding, does that mean anal sex is on the table for every sexual encounter?

No matter how excited someone is to explore anal or how sexually adventurous someone is, anal play requires sensitivity, open communication, and understanding that not everyone is going to be interested in it."We want all safe, ethical forms of sexuality to be out in the open, but that doesn't mean consent is any less important.

In fact, discussions of consent are far more important the closer we move towards a sex positive worldview.

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